Comments on: fetlife etiquette, ohnoes http://www.collaredcoed.com/2008/09/06/fetlife-etiquette-ohnoes/ The college sweater hides the collar Thu, 10 Sep 2009 22:07:53 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Iain http://www.collaredcoed.com/2008/09/06/fetlife-etiquette-ohnoes/comment-page-1/#comment-184 Iain Fri, 21 Nov 2008 09:50:35 +0000 http://www.collaredcoed.com/?p=220#comment-184 We have tried to build a facebook/Myspace style website for those in the scene. We have a genuine and active member base and don't falsely inflate our member figures. We are different to the site you mention and would love you to take a look and give us a try. We have tried to be up front and honest with all our members as its them that will decide the direction of BDSM-Life.com. Warm regards Iain We have tried to build a facebook/Myspace style website for those in the scene. We have a genuine and active member base and don’t falsely inflate our member figures. We are different to the site you mention and would love you to take a look and give us a try. We have tried to be up front and honest with all our members as its them that will decide the direction of BDSM-Life.com.

Warm regards

Iain

]]> By: Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek http://www.collaredcoed.com/2008/09/06/fetlife-etiquette-ohnoes/comment-page-1/#comment-85 Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek Sat, 06 Sep 2008 22:14:37 +0000 http://www.collaredcoed.com/?p=220#comment-85 It seems to me that, just as with life and play protocol, there are as many versions of FetLife protocol as there are people on the site (and that's coming up toward a cool 40,000, so that's quite a few!) so, my suggestion is that you develop your own protocol. Perhaps the best thing to do would be to send anyone you desire to friend a message saying "hi, I saw you at tesfest, I was the one wearing ____ and we talked about ____. Mind if I add you as a friend?" or "hi, I read your blog and would love to add you on a friend on here, do you mind?" or etc. Most people (that I've noticed) are totally down with that, plus they get a bit of an ego stroke from a personal message from you, and that you remembered them/cared enough to want to friend them/etc. As for the profile stuff, that's largely up to you. My Dominus and my profiles are slightly different on a few items, but that's because we're different people. that's what I think, anyway. As for pictures, that would be something to ask your Sir (in my opinion), because what does it matter if other people notice that you don't have your collar on in one of the pics? That's my two cents anyway, and feel free to disagree with me, of course! I'm in no way the be all and end all of FetLife protocol, but that's what I've picked up over the months I've been around, or just how I think about things. There's no way to make everyone happy, so you just need to do what feels right. It seems to me that, just as with life and play protocol, there are as many versions of FetLife protocol as there are people on the site (and that’s coming up toward a cool 40,000, so that’s quite a few!) so, my suggestion is that you develop your own protocol. Perhaps the best thing to do would be to send anyone you desire to friend a message saying “hi, I saw you at tesfest, I was the one wearing ____ and we talked about ____. Mind if I add you as a friend?” or “hi, I read your blog and would love to add you on a friend on here, do you mind?” or etc. Most people (that I’ve noticed) are totally down with that, plus they get a bit of an ego stroke from a personal message from you, and that you remembered them/cared enough to want to friend them/etc.

As for the profile stuff, that’s largely up to you. My Dominus and my profiles are slightly different on a few items, but that’s because we’re different people. that’s what I think, anyway. As for pictures, that would be something to ask your Sir (in my opinion), because what does it matter if other people notice that you don’t have your collar on in one of the pics?

That’s my two cents anyway, and feel free to disagree with me, of course! I’m in no way the be all and end all of FetLife protocol, but that’s what I’ve picked up over the months I’ve been around, or just how I think about things. There’s no way to make everyone happy, so you just need to do what feels right.

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