Today was the first play session where I felt real panic.
I’ve been playing with Sir since September. We play quite often, we’re very close. We have established safewords and safesignals and I’ve used them responsibly. And He has always been responsible as well. Hence, I’ve never felt panic with Him. I’ve felt ‘scared’, but in an exciting, exhilarating way. Even when something goes wrong, Sir takes care of me.
(*Something I overheard two gay men say to each other who were watching the scene. Somehow it seemed appropriate.)
[in order to make it manageable for me, and because so many fucking things happened during New Year's Eve 2008, I'm breaking the posts up about it and spreading it over this week.]
I kissed a girl for the first time within the first two hours of 2008.
Sir and I attended a BDSM club for New Year’s Eve. I was ridiculously excited about the whole thing, and put together a cute outfit. A ‘corset-like’ top (Sir had to interject when He was zipping me into it, “This isn’t a real corset, you know.” and I’ve referred to it as ‘corset-like’ ever since.) a very short pleated skirt, stockings and heels. During the night, I shed the heels for sneakers. I love pain, but one thing I cannot tolerate is pain in my feet. I play tennis frequently and I was in marching band during high school, so any pain in my feet sets me off. Seeing submissives being caned on the soles of their feet makes me wince just thinking about it. Ugh.
